Tuesday, 28th Oct
i learnt a lesson about optimism from one of my bunk mates today. he's a really jovial and happy-go-lucky kind of person, with a smile and a carefree attitude that really makes a difference to us all after a long day of training. what really impressed me most was the fact that he has gone through 3 bmt recourse prior to this present one, failed all three course and yet has not a single complain aboutt his 4th one. what the hell!?! is he for real? i mean seriously, if i were to go through so many recourses, i bet i'd be cursing and swearing each time i go through it. Upon reflection of this, i really felt ashamed that it took a non christian to teach me something that i should have known as a child of God: to never worry and doubt His plans for me as i go through each and every phase of my life. trust in Him always and do not worry.

Wednesday, 29th Oct
i've been given one extra guard duty today. all thanks to a bunch of "chao-keng" ah bengs who can't spare a thought for others. it all happened at night, after all our trainings for the day had ended; seeing that it was still pretty early, one of my bunk mates and myself decided to borrow a basketball from our sergent and shoot some hoops. all was fine until this bunch of ah bengs came along, wanting to play with us. the only problem was that they had all reported sick during the day and were given "light duties" status, whcih meant that they weren't suppose to participate in ANY physical activities. moreover, our sergent had told us that 2 of us will be in deep shit if he finds any light duties presonnels playing with us. try as we may to reason with the ah bengs that they might get us into trouble, it was all to no avail, as they took to the court and took the ball from us. what could we do? snitch on them and end up being labelled as tell-talers? and face the wraith of all the hokkien speaking ah bengs??? and so it was thus, when our sergent saw the whole lot of us playing; all of us had our names written down and given one guard duty, much to my annoyance and anger. tried to reason with my sergent after that .. but i was called an irresponsible person by him.

sergent(3sg): how can you even let them play? don't you know that they are all on light duty???
me: i know, but they insisted on playing! both of us tried to stop them and told them that you didn't allow them to play, but they insisted on doing so anyway.
3sg: do you know that you're being very irresponsible? what happens if one of them falls down or collapses? who will be held responsible? you??

i soooo angry when i was labelled as irresponsible. we're all matured adults! shouldn't we be responsible for our own actions instead? if the others choose to malinger or play while they're on status, shouldn't they be held responsible since they've already been informed that they shouldn't be doing so!? haiz ... it just isn't fair; was so angry that i felt like punching each one of them there and then.


wj: yeah ... i do miss blogging you know; there are times when i have so much things to record after one whole day, but no outlet for me to express myself. all my lost thoughts ...

3 weeks have passed ... 5 more to go.